One bottle short of a six pack

Hi kids!! Sorry I have been gone for a few days, but, those damn kids of mine expect me to be a mother...fucking parasites!! lol

So, I was diddlin (what? its a word...for a hillbilly anyway) around on the puter, and typed in stupid people,,,JACKPOT!! I don't know about you, but I was positively shocked, SHOCKED, I tell you...to find that there are sooooooooooooooooooooooo very many stupid people in the world who do and say soooooooooooooooooooooo very many stupid things!! hahahahahahah. Here are a couple few of the stupid ads that I found...Enjoy!
(The little pink parts are mine...quit thinking that way you pigs!! )

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.--I'll be damned if I am gonna PAY someone to beat my kids when I can do it myself!

Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel

Stock up and save. Limit: one--WTF???

Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating--Yes, a nice, firm, smooth round bottom...perfect for rubbing, and squeezing...oh, sorry, I got a little distracted there!

For sale; and antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers

Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it--Yeah baby, lick me clean!!

Man, honest. Will take anything--Sounds about right

Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first--story of my fucking life folks!

Man is hurt after killing himself--no comment

And, here are a couple few ways to call someone a dumb mother fucker without the dumb mother fucker part...lol and hahahahhahahahah...I am so clever huh?? Oh, shut up! I am...


The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead

All foam, no beer

Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel

Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt--my ex could barely even manage the grunting...unless his big ass was on me a pushin and a sweatin! Uh, just the thought of it makes me want to go at myself with a brillo pad...what the fuck was I thinking??? Live and learn right? lol